We’ve talked a lot of college football lately, but the NFL is also around the corner. And that means cheerleaders. During the course of our daily web surfing we happened to run across the Philadelphia Eagles Cheerleaders’ website (and by “happened to run across” we mean googled “Philadelphia Eagles Cheerleaders” first thing in the morning).
We’ve always been quite enamored with the Eagles cheerleaders. They’re a fascinating bunch. How a city famous for cheesesteaks, gloomy weather, and a generally unattractive population pulls off one of the hottest cheerleading squads in the league with by far the most comprehensive website is beyond us. Our best guess is that the whole phenomenon is Rocky related.
So as a public service we spent some time “researching” the 2008 squad to uncover the most fascinating of the fascinating. Anyone can search for NFL cheerleaders and discover community college dropouts who know sign language and are from big families, but you have to work a little harder to find the truly interesting pretty ladies. And that’s just what we’ve done…
Day Job: Medical Secretary / Model.
Pat’s or Geno’s?: “Both make great cheesesteaks.”
Interesting Fact: “I can drive stick shift wearing 4 inch heels, and I love playing video games with my pink controller.”
Most Unusual Job: “I had a modeling job where I had to jump on a trampoline that looked like a bed for 3 hours to get the right mid-air shot.”
NR’s Commentary: We once tried driving stick in 3 inch heels and it was damn near impossible. Alicia officially has an open invitation to play video games with her pink controller at our place anytime. She best be prepared to have her ass handed to her at Mario Kart though.
College: West Chester University.
Pat’s or Geno’s?: “Neither! Jim’s Steaks on South Street.”
Interesting Fact: “‘I’m in love with gorillas. I’ve always wanted to work with them and be a doctor that studied gorillas like Dian Fossey.”
Your Last Meal Would Be: “Raviolis filled with extra cheese and really good garlic bread.”
NR’s Commentary: You know what’s fascinating? An apostrophe in your name for no reason. If D’arcy is that interested in filling foods and the study of gorillas, we’ll book her a flight to see Booth in the nugget challenge next weekend.
Day Job: Physical Education Teacher.
College: West Chester University.
Pat’s or Geno’s?: “Pat’s.”
Interesting Fact: “I can board-slide a 15 foot rail with a snowboard.”
Greatest Accomplishment: “Graduating from college with Magna Cum Laude honors.”
NR’s Commentary: Let’s get this straight, there are smoking hot chick PE teachers who snowboard out there? Our high school PE teacher was an eighty year-old narcoleptic. What bullshit. Is West Chester University offering graduate courses?
Day Job: Financial Data Systems Analyst.
College: La Salle.
Pat’s or Geno’s?: “Steve’s.”
Interesting Fact: “I can cross and roll my eyes independently from one another, and wiggle my nose.”
What do you love most about Eagles fans?: “They scare the daylights out of any other team’s fans.”
NR’s Commentary: Data Systems Analyst, huh? Sounds hard. Not as hard as rolling your eyes independently from one another though. That’s just god-given talent.
Interesting Fact: “My shoulders are double jointed so I can jump rope with my arms.”
Worst Fear: “The Dark.”
Your Worst Habit Is: “Sugar. I love cotton candy and Peeps.”
NR’s Commentary: We HAVE to see this shoulder trick. HAVE to. Maybe we could toss Peeps at her while she’s doing it. As a side note, the dark is some scary shit.
College: The Laboratory Institute of Merchandising.
Pat’s or Geno’s?: “Geno’s.”
Interesting Fact: “When I was nine years old, I set myself on fire.”
NR’s Commentary: That, our friends, is an interesting fact. Anyone else wondering wtf goes on at the Laboratory Institute of Merchandising?
Day Job: Cadet in the U.S. Army ROTC program.
College: Drexel University.
What do you love most about Eagles fans?: “They instill fear in anyone they encounter.”
Aside from dancing, your ideal job would be: “Ideally, I would want to be a spy with a hot jumpsuit and a matching motorcycle.”
NR’s Commentary: We would definitely tune in to a primetime show about an NFL cheerleader who leads a secret double life as a hot jumpsuit wearing spy on a motorcycle. Somebody make this happen.
Day Job: Construction Estimator.
Pat’s or Geno’s?: “Neither! I don’t eat cheesesteaks.”
Interesting Fact: “Snakes fascinate me and I can’t explain why, I just love looking at them.”
NR’s Commentary: If we weren’t so highbrow we’d make a comment about us having a fascinating snake for Victoria to look at, but that sort of humor is beneath us. Construction Estimator, huh? Over/Under on how many times she’s been asked if she wants fries with that shake? 40?
To check out less fascinating Philadelphia Eagles cheerleaders and their cheesesteak preferences, visit their website. And thanks once again to the Eagles organization for taking their cheerleading squad as seriously as they take cutting unproductive veterans.
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